Nobody Tells me what to do

Detritus Tue Feb 22, 2011 6:38 pm

Joey Porter: Joey Porter here with the Detritus accompanied by Wicked and Truth.
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Detritus: I don’t want you to ask me any questions Joey. I want to ask you a question. How do you feel for the first time in your life standing, actually talking, actually holding a microphone, actually interviewing one half of the new PHWF tag team champions. Tell me the truth are you not mesmerised. Are chills not going up and down your skinny little spine. Are your boots not shaking standing this close to, by the way don’t touch me, don’t ever touch my arm, don’t ever touch my body. I want to know one other thing, not only you but, how do you the fans of PHWF feel, right now at home eating your microwave meals, slurping your beers, eating your pizza’s. How do the women feel, the ladies right now looking at this body. How do the husbands and the boyfriends feel, jealousy , envy, because I’m the women’s pet and the men’s regret. But most of all I want to know is one thing. I want to know is how the PHWF heavyweight title holder, Duke feels right now sitting at home in his over stuffed easy chair. Detritus, the force of nature, the man of the hour, the man with the power is talking to you Duke. Fat pot belly, out of shape, white skinned, you see this sun tan, this is a California sun tan. I got this sun tan in death valley with a hundred and fifty degrees, running in the desert every morning, lifting thousands of pounds. Training hours on end without stopping, drinking mineral water, eating all my stakes raw, for one reason, that is now to win the PWHF heavyweight title.
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Joey Porter: Some people say you threw the match on Tuesday is this correct did you let down all of Friday Night Revive.
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Detritus: Of course I did Joey.
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Joey Porter: But what reason could you give for this.
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Detritus: What reason could I give, I’ll tell you the reason, nobody and I mean nobody tells the force of nature what to do. The force of nature will not be put in a situation he doesn’t want to be put in. When you’re the man that the whole wrestling world revolves around, then nobody and I mean nobody, tells you where to be how to do it, or when to put up my championship belt. In other words if you think your putting me in a ring when I don’t want to be in it, and you know what I talking about, you got another thing coming.
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Detritus points towards the camera. And walks off shot.
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Joey Porter: Detritus is talking about the fact that he and his partner Xoric was put into a match against their will.
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Suddenly Detritus reappears.
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Detritus: I said put that camera back on the champion. You know I have a hard time sometimes communicating with these people. When your looking at greatness, when you got an opportunity to see me, you keep the camera on me. I reiterate nobody in PWHF, the General Manger, you Joey, nobody in the USA, nobody in Europe, or Africa, nobody tells Detritus the force of nature what to do.
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Joey Porter: So you have not heard then Detritus, that GM Mauler is not happy he said if you let him down in another match and he stated that if you do not compete then you and your partner will lose the tag team titles.
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Detritus: I might have guessed. You see Wicked knows it, Truth knows it.
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Both ladies nod their heads.
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Detritus: Hell even you know it Joey. That the PWHF heavyweight champion, Duke has paid off the general manager so he can avoid me. Well let me tell you Duke there is no where to run to and no where to hide. You have a huge target painted on your back and I have set a heat seeker on your trail. I am coming for you.
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Detritus strides off.